Life Matters - August 27, 2025

If our goal in life is to avoid all emotional pain, we certainly miss the mark; do we not? Though we may be one of those who’ve learned not to do it to ourselves, the hurt caused by others, either purposely, unthinkingly, or by the well-meaning, is not so easily always avoided. It may even be that the well-meaning hit the mark of truth and the truth is what hurts. That is worthy of consideration; is it not? 

I am not a pseudo-psychiatrist patient who looks in the mirror to tell myself how goodlooking, smart, and capable I am, nor do I encourage others to do so as it was pride that turned angels into devils. And if it turned angels into devils, how much more can it do so to fallen man, who is naturally on that track already. 

I have, however, fallen into the opposite vice; that of calling myself stupid, or some other choice label, when I made a mistake (usually while working) or something just wasn’t coming together right. I didn’t see it as wrong because I was only talking to myself about myself; wasn’t I? 

Until one day a young man whom I was mentoring (and at times getting mentored by) confessed that he had a problem—with cursing himself—that he had listened to a sermon wherein the preacher had explained how wrong and detrimental it is to curse oneself, even if we don’t use actual curse words, because when we do so we are cursing one of God’s creatures, cursing a part of His creative design. 

We may not think of it, but such self-flagellation (as another friend calls it) enters into our very being and asserts itself there, causing even a Christian to cower and not enjoy life so much because of the self-negativity that builds up inside him or herself causing a breakdown of morale. And then disturbing his or her Christian witness. 

When God is negative about something in our life, it is conviction with a purpose, that purpose always being deliverance in Christ. Flagellation is spiritually purposeless, only designed to give one bad feelings about oneself with an end goal of self-improvement; the key word here being “self.” 

So with renewed purpose I stopped cursing myself and my emotions have been the better, and healthier, for it. I am still tempted, but I repent when I fall into it again, whether in thought or actual words. That being said, emotional hurts and scars by others are not so easily avoided.  

Though we may have learned not to self-flagellate, nor take flagellation from others too personal, still, there is emotional pain that cannot be avoided. Loved ones may get sick, be in pain, may even die. Death of a loved one happens sooner or later to all of us. Or, God forbid, we may be let down, forsaken, by one we loved, perhaps even are married to. 

Love hurts at times. Some may avoid loving as a form of self-protection (Yes, I’ve been there done that) but a loveless life is the greatest hurt of all. It is better to love and to hurt than to never love at all. Hurting because we love seems, as yet, to be unavoidable. It is, however, a sign of healthy emotions, capable of love. May our ultimate love rest in God. In God is where love is safe. God is where love finds its resting place, its safety, its continuity, its reciprocity, its comfort and eternal joy. 

 Love begins in our emotions but if it stops and puddles, or huddles, there, it will eventually stagnate. Love is meant to flow, to wash over and refresh, its recipient. I Corinthians 13:4-7 explains what love is, what it does and how it works. Love is longsuffering, is kind – love does not envy, does not vaunt (brag about) itself, is not puffed up. Does not behave itself unseemly, (indecent) does not seek her own, is not easily provoked, does not think evil. Love bears all, believes all, hopes all, endures all things. Verse 8 says love never fails. 

Love itself never fails us. Loved ones may fail us, friends turn against us, acquaintances dislike our presence, but when we have the freedom to go on loving them we are truly free, because love goes beyond our emotions. Thank God not all comes upon us at the same time! Not usually. God does not suffer us ‘’to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way of escape, that ye may be able to bear it.’ (I Corinthians 10:13) Let us do to others as we would have them do to us. And repent when we fail. 

Is this why President Donald J. Trump’s emotions haven’t cracked; because he loves outside of himself—this country and the citizens of it? Certainly there are many spiritual lessons for us in what we are witnesses to in the political arena these days. 

Jesus Christ is our Savior and the ultimate witness to us of what love is. His unfailing Love, now calling us to His unfailing grace and acceptance, never fails. He never fails us. May our love, complete in Him, never fail. When we do fail, we have an Advocate, Jesus Christ the Righteous. 

Life Matters!